Tag: school

How do you keep friends through your whole life?

If you read this blog regularly you will know that my wife Mandy is a remarkable woman. She certainly knows how to look after me, with all my foibles. One thing I have always been impressed by is that she has stayed close to nine friends from school. At least once a year they go away together on a girls’ weekend and still get on after fifty years.

For the past few years one friend has been missing from the events. Mel and Iain went to live in Australia, which is a long way to come for a weekend. But this week they were visiting the UK, so all the girls and their partners caught up.

I can be a bit antisocial at parties, preferring to hide in a corner, or find an excuse for not coming, but it was genuinely lovely to get back together, The last time “us men” were together must have been over twenty years ago, when most of us had young children and we all went off to centerparcs.

How do the friends stay so close after all this time? I am terrible at staying in touch. There were several of my friends at our Ruby Wedding celebration that I had not seen or spoken to for many many years. I expect the answer is making the effort. Mandy says it is not hard to send a note on a birthday, or pick up the phone. I’d love to make a commitment to change and do better, but realistically I probably won’t.

So I will just admire Mandy and her friends instead. Remarkable.

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When the memories all come flooding back

This week we have continued our narrowboat journey in the East Midlands. This is an area we have not seen before on the canals and not one I am familiar with in real life. We have mostly been travelling on the Erewash Canal, a beautiful but badly maintained and vandalised waterway through the ex-coal towns of Long Eaton, Ilkeston and ending at Langley Mill. We had a tough time, getting grounded due to low water levels, steering past sunken boats and fallen trees, and struggling to open leaky locks.

So you can imagine my surprise when we reached the extravagantly named “Great Northern Basin” at the top of the canal and I found all the fishing signs were from Matlock Angling Club.

I grew up in Matlock and just seeing the signs took me back there. Memories of school lessons, playing in a brass band, singing in a choir, going to church where my Dad was the vicar, going to pubs for the first time, learning about girls. It was not just memories. I could feel what it was to be an adolescent again. Simpler times than now, with no social media, more freedom, fewer expectations. For me they were happy innocent times and all of that came back to me from a few fishing signs.

You may wonder why Matlock Angling Club would cover such a town. the truth is that it is only a few miles away. Great Northern Basin is at the junction of the Erewash and the defunct Nottingham and Cromford canals. Cromford is very close to Matlock. Indeed we had a school reunion there last year.

But when I grew up my parents did not drive and so my view of the world was limited to Matlock and places I would visit by public transport such as Bakewell, Buxton and Derby. Funny to think that now I think nothing of travelling around Europe for a month.

I’d give the Erewash 4 out of 10 as a canal experience, but to bring back being a teenager from a couple of signs, that must be 9 out of 10. Happy days.

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Is 60 too old for a school reunion?

Last Saturday I attended a school reunion for my year at Ernest Bailey Grammar School in Matlock, Derbyshire. We left school in 1982, 41 years ago, and are now 59 or 60 years old. I was really not sure about whether to attend.

We did have one other reunion, after 20 years, and while it was nice to see old school friends, there was something a little too competitive about the conversations. – who could claim to have achieved more with their lives.

This time it was so much more chilled. 54 ex-students came, along with 7 ex-teachers. We are all at or reaching retirement and the conversations were comfortable, reflecting on happy memories from school, and chatting about all our different directions in life. I do not find it easy to mix in social occasions like this but I really made an effort to circulate. I remembered few faces but we had name tags and the names brought back so many more memories than I expected.

No doubt there were people who did enjoy it, but in general students at our school had a really rewarding experience, and that was reflected in our conversations. I do feel sorry for children that these days have so much more pressure for exam results and from social media. School should be a time for study, learning how to get on with others, for play and for mischief – not necessarily in that order.

So thankyou so much to Helen and Sarah for organising the event. 60 is clearly not too old for a school reunion. Happy days.

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