I now this sounds ridiculous. I know it is a first world problem. I know people are dying around the world from the pandemic. But I am upset today because my water bottle is broken.
Firstly let me be clear that this is totally my fault. I put the bottle in a dishwasher and… well you can see. And it is just a water bottle. I am sure I can pick up another for a few quid. But it upsets me. I think there are two reasons.
The bottle has a branding from my last job. And so losing it is a reminder that I am no longer working. I love my retirement, but as each link to work goes, I also lose that part of my identity that for forty years defined who I am.
I find myself getting increasingly upset about trivial things these days. I cry at the most innocuous of films. I cried when I heard my niece had had a baby this week. I even cried at the weekend watching ”Saturday Night Takeaway”, the lightest of light entertainment TV shows. Part of it I think comes from the retirement. I am more relaxed, more vulnerable perhaps. I no longer have to put on my emotional armour to deal with the stresses of a job where managing crises was a frequent occurrence.
And I also blame Covid-19. For more than a year we have lived under the threat of severe illness and death. We have all found ways to get on with it but now that the UK seems to be coming out the other side I think that 12 months worth of adrenaline and cortisol is washing out of my body and making me more emotional.
Or maybe I should get a sense of perspective!
Have you lost anything trivial and been unreasonable upset?